Finding Joy in the Little Things — And Why Letting Go of Outcomes is the Secret to a Fuller Life

“Wherever you go, no matter the weather, always bring your own sunshine”
– Anthony J.D. Angelo

After I launched Whispers Within Us in November, I spent a lot of time waiting.

I felt like I was waiting for a big boom. After over a year of pouring my heart and soul into that book, I think somewhere in the back of my mind I had built up this image of what the “after” was going to look like. A part of me kept hoping that an overnight shift that would tell me — okay, it’s happening.

And while I was so busy waiting for that, I almost completely missed what was actually happening.

Looking back at December, I can see it now. My launch was successful, but I was not yet putting myself out there as much as I have been in the past couple of months. And my results have been coming through steadily, not all at once. Things have been unfolding beautifully, meaningfully, and one small step at a time. But because none of it matched the specific outcome I had in my head, I felt almost disappointed. When I realized what was happening, I kept telling myself, “It’s going to happen. It’s just not happening today.”

That one little reminder carried me through, and reminded me to keep going. 

And that’s what I want to share with you today. Joy doesn’t live in the destination. It lives in the journey, in the small quiet moments, in the things we rush past because we’re too focused on where we’re trying to get to.

And the sooner we loosen our grip on the outcomes we’re expecting, the sooner we open ourselves up to something even better than what we could have ever planned.

The Trap of the Expected Outcome

We all do this. We set our sights on how something is going to go, and without even realizing it, we become emotionally attached to that specific version of events. And don’t get me wrong, there’s nothing wrong with having expectations — they give us direction, motivation, something to move toward and they help us make plans and take action.

But they can also work against us.

When we become too attached to one particular outcome, we stop being able to see anything else. We stop noticing the equally beautiful things that are unfolding in a different direction. And instead of taking pleasure in what’s actually happening around us, we end up mourning for the anticipation left unfulfilled.

We miss the magic because we’re too busy waiting for the miracle we had already decided on.

I lived this after my book launch. I had anticipated a certain kind of boom. And when it didn’t arrive on my timeline, I let that expectation steal my joy. I was so focused on what hadn’t happened yet that I wasn’t giving myself permission to celebrate everything that already had!

And as soon as I realized that, I knew, I had to take action.

What Happened When I Took Action Instead of Waiting

When things finally shifted for me, it was because I decided to. 

Instead of waiting for it, I started journaling through it (really sitting with what came up) and I noticed that the same message kept finding its way onto the page: take action. And I didn’t feel overwhelmed by it, because I knew it wasn’t a big, sweeping, or dramatic action. I just needed to do one small thing at a time.

My first step was to fill out applications to guest on podcasts. And so that was the first thing I did. 

Then, I reached out to a publicity company to help me get the word out there.

And after I did those things, I started getting some inquiries on my own. 

Every single time I took one small step forward, an opportunity would open up. 

I did a TV interview. Guested on podcasts. And my calendar finally started filling up with opportunities to talk about my book. 

None of it was the big bang I had been waiting for. But all of it together? That is the journey. That is the dream being made, one small action at a time. And once I stopped looking for the destination and started appreciating each individual step, everything felt completely different.

Life, success, everything, is a journey. Not a destination. Meaning, you have to make the dream come true — it doesn’t just appear. But when you show up, take action, and stay open to however it unfolds, it will take you somewhere more beautiful than you planned.

The Little Voice That Tries to Stop You

Of course, taking action requires something first. It requires silencing (or at least managing) the voice that pipes up every time you’re about to do something meaningful.

You know the one.

“Why me? Why do I think I’m good enough to do this? Who am I to put this out into the world?”

That’s imposter syndrome. And it tries to show up for all of us, at exactly the wrong moment, every single time.

Here’s what I’ve learned to do with mine: I gave it a name. I call it Worble.

And I know that might sound silly, but stay with me — because there is something genuinely powerful about giving that voice a name. It takes something that feels enormous and suffocating and makes it small, manageable and almost a little bit ridiculous. Because that voice inside you that’s scared, is not the truth. It’s just trying to derail your progress and keep you exactly where you are.

And the moment I catch my Worble trying to sneak in, I reframe.

“Why not me? Why CAN’T I do this?”

And then there’s the other voice… the external one. The opinions of people around you when you’re doing something new, something different, something that doesn’t fit the box they had for you. For me, this voice was loud when I left real estate and people started asking what I was doing next, everyone had something to say. And I had to come to a place (not overnight, but eventually), of understanding that what other people think about your path has absolutely nothing to do with where your path is going.

Their opinions are none of your business.

So, don’t let anyone take your joy. It is your joy to protect. And sometimes the best way to protect it is to keep it close, keep it quiet, and let your successes be your truth.

Finding Joy in the Little Things

Everything we’ve talked about — releasing expectations, taking action, reframing the setbacks — it all leads here. To the practice of noticing what is actually, genuinely, beautifully present in your life right now.

When we stop gripping so tightly to the outcomes we’re waiting for, something remarkable happens. We start to see the profound blessings that are hiding in the ordinary moments. Ones we’ve been rushing past for years. Ones that don’t look like much from the outside but feel like everything when we finally actually stop and let them land.

Here are some of mine. The little things that genuinely bring me joy (not in a someday, when-everything-is-perfect kind of way). But right now. 

My cup of coffee in the morning brings me joy.

It sounds so simple, and it is. But when I actually stop and hold it and take that first sip, it brings me a smile every time. 

Sitting next to my dogs and just being with them brings me joy.

Not multitasking or doing anything else. Just petting them and letting myself be present in that moment of unconditional, uncomplicated love.

The sound of my wind chimes brings me joy.

There’s something so peaceful about that sound that I can’t fully explain, it just settles something in me and brings me joy.

The feeling of the sun on my face brings me joy.

Actually stopping, turning toward it, and letting it warm me brings me so much joy. That kind of stillness and warmth is available to us every single day and most of us never take it.

My waterfall brings me joy.

I have a waterfall in my backyard that genuinely brings me so much peace and joy. It is my philosophy that it is always worth spending money on the things that bring you joy. Real, genuine, daily joy is an investment in your quality of life. So, if you have something on your mind that is this, don’t talk yourself out of it!

The animals who visit my home bring me joy.

There are some crows that come almost daily to visit and get a snack from my porch, and seeing them brings me joy. I have also often seen deer, a little fox, and tons of beautiful butterflies. And any time an animal visits, it brings me joy, and I take a moment to notice it, and to appreciate it. 

Being in nature brings me joy.

It brings me joy just to sit on my patio, and be in nature. Not accomplishing anything. Not checking anything off. Just being.

These are not grand gestures. They are not Instagram moments. They are just life! The real, quiet, beautiful texture of a life being lived with intention and attention. And when I make space for them, I find joy, inner peace, gratitude, harmony, alignment, meaning, and purpose.

All of it. In the simplest little things you can always find joy.

The Mindset Shift That Makes It All Possible

When I talk about mindset shifts, this story always comes to mind. 

Years ago, when I was doing home organizing and staging, I worked with a client from her attic all the way to her basement over the course of six months. I didn’t go in with a grand outcome in mind. I wasn’t trying to transform her life. I was just there to help her have less stuff. The goal was to clear the clutter that had accumulated and create some breathing room in her home.

Nine months later, I ran into her.

She had lost a significant amount of weight. She had completely changed and her whole energy was different. We got to talking and she said ever since we cleared out all the clutter, her mind was clear, she felt lighter and started going for walks, eating healthier and taking care of herself. It was almost effortless, her mindset had completely shifted. And in that moment, I realized how profound the mental connection is. I realized, when you clear the clutter on the outside, the mindset follows. So, the space you create in your physical environment creates space in your mind, in your heart, in your whole way of moving through the world.

This is why I still do this in my own home. I’ll walk through and find 55 things I no longer need. Old pens, jeans that don’t fit, things that are empty, things I’ve been keeping out of habit or guilt. I let them go. And every time I do, something loosens in me too.

The less we cling to specific outcomes, to stuff, to anything really, the more aligned we become with our actual life. Which can only unfold for us when we finally get out of its way.

Opening your heart and mind to a wide variety of possible outcomes instead of fixating on one is not pessimism, giving up, or settling.

It’s freedom. And joy.

Joy is Always Within You, Even When You Don’t Feel Like it.

A few years ago, I was sitting in an apartment after my divorce, staring out a window that overlooked a river, not knowing what was next for me. I had no plan. But what I did have was a journal, a quiet space, and a lot of uncertainty that I was slowly learning to call opportunity.

At that time, I didn’t know I would write a book. I didn’t know I would launch it in Times Square. I didn’t know I would be on television talking about it, or that any of the things that have happened in the last year were even possible for me.

None of it was planned. And all of it has been better than anything I could have planned.

Because I stopped waiting for a specific outcome and started paying attention to what was actually unfolding. I started noticing the small things like the signs and the quiet whispers that were guiding me forward one small step at a time.

And I want that for you.

This week — not someday, not when things calm down, not when the big thing finally happens — this week, I want you to put down the outcome you’ve been gripping so tightly. Just for a moment. And look around at what’s actually here.

What is your version of the morning coffee? The wind chimes? The sun on your face?

What small, quiet, easy-to-miss thing has been trying to bring you joy that you’ve been rushing past because you’re too focused on where you’re trying to get to?

Because the joy was never in arriving at the destination. It’s within and around you all along, just in the little things, in the ordinary moments, in the whispers that have been trying to reach you every single day.

All you have to do is slow down enough to notice. 🦋

I’d love to know — what is one little thing that brings you genuine joy that you’ve been rushing past lately? 

Ready to go deeper into living with intention and hearing your inner whispers? 

Grab your copy of Whispers Within Us at the link below.

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Love, Light, and Gratitude 🩵 

— Kathleen